


A Cold Day In Jasper (Optimus Prime x Reader)

by A_Raven



Series: Love, Life, and a New Home [2]
Category: Transformers: Prime
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Death, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Grieving, Hurt/Comfort, Parental Death, military family member death
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-23
Updated: 2020-10-23
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:07:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27155680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/A_Raven/pseuds/A_Raven
Summary: It's a rainy day in Jasper, nothing is too out of the ordinary until Optimus is told that you haven't been answering anyone, and that your father has passed away recently. Now everyone's on the search to find you, worried on how hard you're taking this with knowing how close you were to your father.
Relationships: Optimus Prime/Reader
Series: Love, Life, and a New Home [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/852920
Comments: 2
Kudos: 37





	A Cold Day In Jasper (Optimus Prime x Reader)

The day was an odd one for Jasper Nevada. The air was humid, sickly so. The sun was hidden behind thick grey clouds, causing a rather gloomy over cast. It was supposed to rain, weather like this needed after a long drought in the desert.

It had been a slow day for the bots. There had been a trip to scout a possible energon source. It lead nowhere, much to the bots disappointment. But other than that, it had been a slow day. Optimus was speaking with Ratchet, worried about their energon reserves.

Most of the bots had been out with their humans, bonding as normal. They were still fairly new to each other, it had been a month or so, but it was still a lot to get used to. Optimus had planned to spend time with you, but you were insistent on staying home. Alone. He hadn't spoken to you, sending you texts. Over the texts you seemed distant to the red mech, you always had been since meeting the autobots. But this was different. He couldn't understand what though. He assumed it was something at school that had been bugging you. He didn't think much about it.

He had been so tuned into the conversation with ratchet he hadn’t even noticed Agent Fowlers arrival. He greeted the human, much to his surprise. It was quite a random visit from the human. Fowler looked rough, his suit a bit messy, and he looked tired.

"Prime-.... (Y/N).. She isn't with you?" His voice came more of begging, hoping he had finally found you.

"No... She's at home. Why do you wish to see her, Agent Fowler?"

The man ran a hand over his face. "She's not home.. Trust me I checked. I've been searching for her since I heard the news.."

The prime's facial plate contorted with growing worry and confusion. "I'm afraid I don’t understand..."

Fowler looked to the mech. "she... hasn't told you?.."

The two were quiet for a moment, both waiting for the other to speak.

"Her dad died."

________________________________________________________

After hearing the news from Fowler, along with your sudden disappearance, the entire team was sent out looking for you. Searching the entire town of Jasper with no clues. Your house was locked up and you weren't inside, so likely had left on your own. But your car was in the drive way. No one had any idea where you were. Day started turning to night and there was still no word from you.

Everyone was getting worried, Optimus especially. The town wasn’t large, so where were you? The mech had been nonstop searching for you, driving everywhere near your home and panning out from there. It was around ten at night now. The night air of jasper wasn’t cold but it was enough to make the bot worry more with the rain finally starting to drizzle down from the heavens in a light trickle. 

The street lights had turned on by this point and a small amount of fog carried in from the humidity. Through the dimness of it all, the autobot leader didn’t lose hope in finding you. Making his way a bit out of the boundaries of town to an older park, he had taken you there previously once or twice, you had just wanted to see if it was still there after all these years. 

At the time he didn’t mean to ask you why you were so interested in the park. You were quiet about it. The day he took you was the day after your father left overseas again after his few week visit in for maintenance on his overseas vehicles that needed heavy fixing in the states again. You were missing your father, and said seeing the park made you feel better, even a bit. 

He didn’t know why he didn’t think of this park first. Maybe he had checked it and didn’t see you before. But as he pulled up, in the dark mist of the night, only a few dull street lights to illuminate the area in the drizzle. He saw you from his position on the street. 

You were sitting under a tree, the tree had lost all of its leaves with it being so close to winter, so you had little to no protection from the rain. Bundled up in a jacket and clutching your knees to your chest. An object was being firmly held in your lap, clutched tightly like it was the only thing that mattered to you now. Your hood was pulled up and strings pulled tightly so it was hard to see your face. 

The bot waited a moment before transforming, the sudden sound jarring you. You head snapping up to look up at the autobot leader standing on the street nearby. Your eyes were tired, blood shot. You looked exhausted, both mentally and physically. I shaky breath escaped your body as you settled down again, remaining silent as Optimus took a few careful steps towards you.

He wasn’t sure what to say. While he himself had experienced countless deaths of bots very close to him in his lifetime, he knew this was different. Humans don’t live long lives to be sure, but in the short life spans they did have they made very strong bonds with their comrades, especially ones of blood relation from what Optimus knew. He also knew after the last few months of being your guardian that your mother had died as well when you were very young. He never pressed for details, feeling from your reactions to even telling him, that it was a hard topic for you to speak of. 

He was silent, watching for a moment. Though he had been tracking you down all day once he learned what happened, it only came to him now he hadn’t thought of what to do. He was unsure of how to help a human comrade through grieving. 

“H-… hi Optimus.” 

Your voice caused the boss bot to pull himself from his internal struggle of worry and turn down to you again. You sniffled and rubbed your nose with your wet sleeve, it was clear being out in the cold and rain was doing nothing good to your health. Your body was trembling from the cold. Your voice was quiet as well, it was hoarse, and he could only assume this was the symptoms of crying quite a bit. Another sullen shaken breath escaped your lips, the air cold enough to just start seeing your breath in a fog.

“I-… I’m sorry I didn’t come today. I know I told you I could drive myself… that... Wasn’t... The problem.” You stumbled over your words, reaching up to tuck a strand of wet hair back under your hoodie. “I... I know I promised I would help the others with their science fair projects… I just-“

“Agent Fowler told me what happened.” Optimus said bluntly. 

You stopped and gave a nod, body shaking more as you rubbed one of your eyes. “I-… I guessed he would… h-have you been looking for me?”

“We all have. We’ve been worried about you.” He says. 

Optimus’ voice is monotone, and usually hard to tell just from his voice what he’s feeling. But here he was quieter, almost like the titanous mech was trying to be gentle even in speech to his young human friend. 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you all worry…” You trailed off, forced to take a deep breath as your chest heaved, causing you to hiccup and wheeze softly, and doing your hardest to fight the tears that tried to come. “I… I can’t… he’s gone.”

You curled up, clutching what was in your hands even tighter, for a moment before unfurling a bit. Enough for Optimus to see what you were holding. A wooden triangular box. It was fairly thick, and the top was covered in a glass pane to view inside the box. Inside was what looked like a triangular folded American Flag. 

“I-.. I thought... I had prepared myself for anything.” You sobbed, tears streaming down your face alongside the rain. “A-after mom died, I-… I... I didn’t know how to feel… I...I was so little… and... My dad was so sad… I couldn’t let myself be sad because he needed me to be happy. B-but deep down I knew with his job, this might happen. I just... I wasn’t ready. I wasn’t ready for him to go! I wasn’t ready to be alone!”

It wasn’t long until you curled back up, clutching the last memento of your dad to you. The box and flag that they gave to you with his dog tags when they told you the grave news. Your body trembled in the cold rain and from the sobs that racked your body. 

"You're not alone." Optimus' voice broke the vocal silence. He knelt down beside you, optics watching your every move. You were still curled in on yourself. "Loss of any magnitude is hard on anyone. If you would allow me to, I would like to help you."

You could hear the sympathy in his voice. He cared, he was doing his best to show it. All of them cared. They had been out all night searching for you because they knew you would be broken right now. You yourself knew you shouldn't be alone. With a shaken nod you looked up.

"Of course..."

Prime’s features seemed to soften a bit, to see that you were at least willing to accept help. He knew many that would refuse and would isolate themselves away from everyone they could to attempt to grieve in peace. It wasn’t the healthiest way he knew of how to get past the overwhelming feelings that came along with a sudden loss. 

As you approached him he transformed back to his vehicle form and opened his passenger door. With a shivering sigh you moved slowly, heaving yourself up into his cabin. Outside of the rain with the door closed you began to shiver horribly. Only now realising how cold you really were being absolutely soaking wet. It wasn’t absolute suffering though, Optimus quickly turned on his heater so you could start warming up. 

You sluggishly buckled up and sat back in the seat, still clutching the flag close to your chest. Teeth lightly chattering as optimus began to drive you back to the base. You were very quiet, as was he. Letting you take your time, not wanting to push you to talk more if you didn’t want to. Your head rested against the window, looking at the droplets that would get whisked across the glass. 

The sound of the Prime’s massive engine, rumbling to your core, was soothing in a way. You felt so tired, your eyes burned from the amount you had already cried. Your chest pained, feeling like you were being torn apart from the inside, dwelling on the thought of what happened just seemed to hurt more.

You wished you could forget for a while, you knew that was denial, but it was something that stopped the pain. But the idea of wanting to forget that he was gone, hurt you even more. That you could wish for something like that. You wished you could tell him that, talk to your father about how hard grieving was. But you couldn’t. You never could again. 

You couldn’t see his smile. Couldn’t go on father daughter outing where you would see any new movie he thought was cool. Couldn’t play games with him, couldn’t hug him. Couldn’t message him and tell him how much you loved him, and how much you would miss him.

How much you do miss him. 

When he left you thought it would be like every other time he went overseas, whether he took you with him to a safer area, or if he went alone to a dangerous place. You thought he would come back. He promised he would. You weren’t going to ever blame him dying on him. 

You blame yourself that you didn’t cherish the time you had with him more before he passed. You closed your eyes for a second and when you opened them again you could see the inside tunnel that lead inside to the base. Did you fall asleep for a few minutes?.. Must have. 

When Optimus came to a stop it took a moment more than usual before he opened his door. Slowly you stumbled out and onto the main floor of the base, looking up as optimus transformed again. Normally you would still feel a bit intimidated by the mech being so close while you were on the ground, but you were too tired to care.

His optics fell on you, his optical ridge furrowed in worry. Probably for good reason, you felt like shit more so than just your feelings and the ever godly present pain in your chest. It probably wasn’t your best decision to stay out in the rain all night. But you wanted to be alone for a bit, to try and collect your thoughts. You failed miserably, so thankfully Optimus had found you. 

Loud metal on metal footsteps came from one of the massive corridors to the other rooms of the base. Looking up you could see Ratchet coming in with an armful of random machinery. His optics immediately caught sight of the leader autobot and then trailed down to you. 

“You found her, very good.” He huffed, his normally rough tone towards anything to do with you or the other humans in their care, was much kinder than it usually was. He put his armful of things down next to the ground bridge control panel before turning back to you two.

His optics stayed on you for a moment, while you weren't looking, you could feel his gaze on you. “Your bodily temperature is much higher than it should be for humans.”

“Yeah.. I can feel that…” You mumble, wondering if they even heard you with how quiet and hoarse your voice was. You felt dehydrated despite how soaking wet you were. 

Optimus hummed in thought, and the room was uncomfortably quiet for a minute. You felt like you were about to pass out when you heard Optimus speak again, waking you from your near moment of passing out. You heard him speak, but didn’t take it fully in, blinking and looking up at him with the absolute look of exhaustion.    
  
“I’m… sorry I didn’t- I wasn’t really paying attention, I’m sorry. What did you say?” Your sentence being cut off a small bit of coughing every few words. You really did feel like utter shit. 

“It’s quite fine. I was informing you that I contacted nurse Darby and she instructed me that you should use the facility human quarters shower to warm up. She said she is on her way with a change of clothing for you.”

You gave a nod, a warm shower and some sleep sounded really good. Were you sleeping here tonight? You doubted Optimus would want you to be alone right now, and that’s exactly what home would be right now. A crushing and overwhelming emptiness that would just be a constant reminder that you didn’t even get to show your dad how you had cleaned up and make the new house look nice. Every thought of how much life you had life, and how much life you wouldn’t have with your dad. 

“Are you alright?” Ratchet’s voice came, pulling you out of your stupor. 

A shaky breath came to you as your fingers dug into the wooden frame you were holding, you shook your head. “No… I’m not...I-.. where’s the showers at?” 

“I can take you to them if you like.” Optimus offered, kneeling beside you and offering you a servo to climb onto. 

You nodded, too tired to try and find your way through the base. You were surprised when the metal under you was warmer than you were. Probably not the best sign but, it was what you felt. Optimus lifted you up and held you close to his chest. He didn’t protest when you leaned against the massive chassis. Your body was demanding rest for the hell it had been going through. But you needed to stay up a bit longer. You couldn't go to bed soaking wet. 

Optimus had navigated quickly to a section of the base you had seen, but knew it wasn't used since it wasn't really renovated for the bots use. But it was apparently still in working order for you to be able to take a quick shower. Lucky you.

He knelt down by the smaller doors that lead to the old human quarters of the silo. You scooted off his palm and onto the more harsh concrete floor, standing on shaky legs before you had to balance back on his still waiting servo for a second. You could feel his fingers shift a bit, feel his optics looking at you from behind, you took a second to gather yourself more before you pushed off a bit before opening the door to the showers. 

You paused in the doorway when you heard Optimus say your name. You lean against the door frame as you turn back to look back up to him. 

“I will be in the base for the rest of the night. If you need anything, I am a message away.”

You gave a nod and a mumbled thanks. The bot gave a nod as well before he stood, waiting for you to get inside the small locker room looking area before you heard his footsteps thump down the hall. 

Looking in the room it seemed like a big locker room, it was almost intimidating to just be there all alone. A big empty room, lined with a few rows of lockers that lead to the opposite end of the room. Further right against the wall was a line of showers, the only cover they offered was a small lining curtain between each one. It was definitely military. Not very good for trying to be numb about things with this. 

You sighed, running a hand over your tired face, walking over to the showers you placed the wooden triangle with the burial flag inside. They usually didn’t give burial flags the way they did when they gave you this one, you know from what your father told you in the past that they would have it drape over the casket as it's being lowered in during the funeral. But.. they said they were not sure if there could be a funeral in the states. 

They didn't tell you why, but it was a horrible thought. That only ever happened during something horrible. You had learned in history many years ago in middle school, usually during the world wars, that bodies couldn't be returned to the families to bury because they couldn't be identified, usually because of the bodies being mangled in some explosion or anything else that would lead to there being too many bodies. The thought that your father passed away in such a horrible gruesome way was horrifying. 

You swallowed thickly before setting the flag down on a bench near the shower you had picked to use. Your stomach was in knots, you didn’t want to cry anymore, your entire body was sore from just the last few hours. Your eyes hurt, you hadn’t eaten or drank anything in a while, you weren't sure if you had any more hydration to lose through crying. 

You shook yourself from the feeling, at least for now so you could take your shower. It was more difficult than you thought to peel the sopping wet and cold clothing from your body. But once it was off you already felt so much better, setting it all in a soaking wet heavy pile on the ground by the bench. 

Stumbling your way forward you turned on the shower, the default cold temperature already warmer than you currently were. But as the water began to gradually warm up you let out a sigh, your shoulders drooping as you could finally relax the slightest bit. You closed your eyes, taking a deep breath as you ran your fingers through your hair. 

It was like that for what felt like hours before you heard a soft knock on the metal door to the locker room you were in. When you didn’t answer you heard the door creak open. 

“Hi, it’s me- Jack’s mom.” You heard Miss Darby call, hearing the tapping of her footsteps towards you. “I brought you a change of clothes and some pillows and blankets. Optimus said you might be staying here for a bit. I left the bedding things with him.”   
  
You gave a hum in response before the room was left in an awkward silence. You heard her shifting about before she moved again.

“I’m going to take your wet clothes and wash them at home. I’ll be back tomorrow to give you a quick checkup alright, I can bring you some food in the morning as well. Is there anything you would want?”

You were quiet, feeling weird. You had spoken to her before, and while she was normally very nice, you could tell that just like with Optimus’, her tone was softer. Gentle. Acting like you would shatter with anything more of a normal tone. Which in all honesty, you felt like you might. 

“I-.. don’t have a preference.. Thank you though..” You managed, not wanting to leave her in silence after everything she was doing for you. 

“Alright, I’m going to be going back home then back to work, but if you need me you can get my number from Jack or Optimus. Try to take it easy tonight.”

Another hum of confirmation from you was all she needed before she bid you a good night and left a moment later. You didn’t stay in the shower too much longer after that before you got out of the shower. Peeking out of the curtain you saw a folded towel and a set of plaid pajamas sitting on the bench next to the burial flag. 

Shivering all the way, hobbling over, you scooped up the towel and worked quickly to dry yourself. Your body began to feel much heavier than when Optimus had found you in the park. You felt a bit more awake after the shower, and less like shit. Your nose wasn’t as stuffed, but your body being relaxed from the warm water felt much heavier to haul yourself around. 

You got dressed quickly, sitting down on the bench and sitting your head in your hands as you leaned over. The new weight of stress washed over you, added that you had worried everyone on a panicked spree to find you. You knew you should have messaged someone, but you just couldn’t at the time. You felt so bad that everyone had been out looking for you almost all afternoon into what was now..

You pulled out your phone and looked at the time. It was currently 11pm. You groaned, tapping your foot as you tried to think over what you should do. You felt so cluttered mentally, too much on your plate to take in. You wanted to reach out for help, you knew it was the best thing to do, but the thought of troubling anyone with what you were going through ached you a bit. Your foot bounced a bit as you tried to calm down and think of what to do. 

Giving in you opened up your messages and tapped into your messages with Optimus. He had sent a few that you didn’t see until now through the last few hours, asking where you were and if you were alright. The bubbling guilt continued to build inside, your chest hurting more as you tried to to type out something to send. 

_ ‘I finished showering. Miss Darby gave me new clothes. I’m staying here tonight?’ _

You expected to wait a few minutes but the response you got was almost immediate. 

Big Red :  **_‘It is probably for the best you stay here for the night. Nurse Darby has given me human bedding for you to use while here.’_ **

_ ‘Yeah, she told me. Am I sleeping on the couch?’  _ You replied.

**_‘Ratchet will be busy in that room from what I saw when we arrived. I have set up your things in my chamber, I do not mind you using my berth for the time being.’_ **

You didn’t reply for a moment, tapping your foot again and groaning as you ran a hand through your damp hair. It felt like your heart was racing, riddled with anxiety. Your fingers hovered over the buttons to type something. Anything. But nothing came. Optimus must have sensed from your lack of response over the last few minutes that you didn’t know how to respond so his message popped up again. 

**_‘I’m on my way.’_ **

You inhaled deeply, shoving your phone in your pocket as you gathered the burial flag into your arms again. You stood and shuffled your way to the door, walking out just as you felt the footsteps of the Prime shake the ground lightly. Human eyes met cybertronian optics as he knelt before you again. 

“How are you feeling?” His voice rumbled above you. 

All you could really manage was a soft shrug as your eyes trailed tiredly down to the floor. He gave another small nod as before and laid his servo before you. Being carried through the base you laid back against the prime again. Your mind began to wander how many deaths of close loved ones Optimus had seen. Relationships that he’d had with that were much longer than even your own lifetime. Bots that he was close to that were taken from him in the war that had waged on Cybertron. In perspective it almost seemed silly your reaction to your fathers death. Such a short time to be wallowing over. 

But at the same time, your life was far shorter than that of the aliens you met. It made the little time you had more cherished in a way. But also the fact that you didn’t have anyone in your life other than your father for the longest time. You had friends now, but that’s all you had left was your father. Now you had no one. Optimus in the war seemed to have comrades to mourn with, or at least that's what you would assume. But here, you had people to support you… but no one knew your dad here but you. Your pain was your alone. 

Getting to Optimus’ room you looked up to see the familiar area that you often studied in whenever you were spending time around your guardian. It wasn’t the first time you had spent the night and he let you sleep on his berth. But you felt like this might just be longer than the one night he had offered. You felt you would be ditching a bit of school the next few days. You didn’t have the strength to attempt to concentrate on your education. You would be putting yourself behind but in the current moment you didn’t care. 

When your eyes fell to the massive berth off to the side a bit, you could see almost a nest of blankets near the head of the bed like padding. He walked to it and lowered his servo for you to climb in, which you did so. Sitting on the comforting mass of blankets and a few pillows. You sat in the center of the nest and simply stared off into the distance, your chest heaved, suddenly struggling to control your emotions. You could feel your eyes start to burn, your chest pained, a spreading pain that caused you to clutch your shirt over your chest.

You jumped a bit when you felt the cool metal digit against your arm. Your burning eyes looked back up to the prime. You could see that he was pained to see you in this much distress, a silent question of ‘how can I help?’. You really didn't know. You never experienced this level of suffering, a webbing torture that pulsed through your veins with every beat of your heart. Your lips moved with a quiet begging few words. 

“Don’t leave…  _ please _ .” Your voice croaked, hand shaking as one moved from clutching your only memento of your father to grasp at the large metal finger that was attempting to soothingly rub your arm. 

“I will not leave you.” He says firmly, a very serious tone to his words that gave you quite a bit reassurance. But you were still shaken about the thought of being left alone again. It was quiet for a moment before this time you broke the silence.

“I don’t know why.. I wasn’t expecting this to hurt this much.” You say, voice cracking and bottom lip starting to tremble. You could feel your eyes burn with more tears, blinking causing them to fall onto your cheeks. “I don’t know how to handle this. I keep expecting it to be a nightmare or a terrible prank, and that I’ll go home tomorrow and my dad will just be there. But i… I know he won’t. I don’t want to go back to that house and be alone again. I don’t want to be alone anymore, he was all I had left Optimus… I don't know what to do, I don't have a job, I won't be able to afford the house I live in, and I don't know what I'll do. He was all I had-”

Optimus cut you off by saying your name, stopping you from further delving into your panic. 

“Do not worry about those burdens right now. You will not be alone in these endeavors, I will be here to aid you. I will not leave you to bear the weight of this new world alone.” 

You swallowed thickly and nodded, rubbing the tears out of your eyes best you could. Your breath was still heavy and ragged, it was hard for you to calm down. Even after minutes of trying to just breath it still looked and felt like you were going to pass out. 

“If you would like, I have not recharged in a few cycles, I can rest here with you for the night. You would rest alone.” He offered, an offer you found yourself nodding to much quicker than you probably would have anytime before. 

Carefully Optimus moved, shifting the blankets as he laid himself down on birth, the nest of blankets practically resting atop his shoulder and next to his head. Gently his servo came, moving you closer and gently pushing you to lay down, knowing you were now too emotionally turmoil to do anything.

“Rest. You need to rest. You are ill.” His voice came, rumbling beside you with how close you were. 

You gave a nod, curling up beside him and hesitantly resting your head against the metal plating on the side of his helm. Your eyes began to close the moment you really could rest, your body now laying down knowing that you didn't have anything left to do, and you could just sleep. 

“Sleep well.” The Prime’s voice came still rumbling but almost distant as you slowly succumbed to slumber. Unprepared for the future and anything it now held for you, but comforted by the fact, that you knew you could trust someone. The one person you felt could help you through this, through anything that could be thrown at you. You would have to thank optimus in the future for being this kind to you in your time of need. But for now, and for quite a while, you would simply be.    
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> No my dad's not dead, i just had inspiration from how scared i was of this happening to my dad when i was younger.


End file.
